Oldest eBay Store Listing retired when store closed

, and thank you for checking out this Thing.

Description Of The Thing:
This Thing consists of a service, not a Thing. Do you guys need some private consultation about having or getting Blastomycosis? We will provide that if you are the high bidder in this auction. Here’s how it works:

Blastomycosis, or Gilchrist’s disease, is an affliction that affects almost nobody every year. Doctors can be frustratingly slow in diagnosing it because virtually nobody has ever gotten it for as long as they can remember (Disclaimer: none of this is true in Wisconsin).

Blasto comes from a fungus that hides in “earth”, or “dirt”, and decaying wood, which is “everywhere”, unless you live in a climate where rotting isn’t commonplace, like inside of a pyramid. Incidence of this condition throughout the population likely to live near rotting stuff like that is estimated to be one person out of every hundred thousand. So I was thinking, if there are sixty million registered eBay users, there must be around 599 of you Other Sufferers out there.

If you would like to draw upon my experience (2003) with having Blasto, and actually succesfully getting it diagnosed for just under twenty thousand dollars WITHOUT INVASIVE SURGERY, please consider lunging at my Buy-It-Now clickie thingie, and I will be very happy to answer any of your questions for a price of two dollars, which I have surmised from a lot of research, is the Usual Price of Truth in a person-to-person marketing setting.

Condition Of The Thing:
Because I have already committed a huge amount of print about Having Blasto at my own personal for-profit fancy dancy web site, I cannot absolutely guarantee that the Blasto Info you will receive from me is unpublished, but I WILL guarantee that you have never received the same information in an email, or you get another completely different answer, free of charge. So, in that respect, your answer will be fresh, new, rare, and enticing.

Shipping And Fiddling:
Unless you want overnight delivery, there are no shipping fees for this item. That’s because it’s delivered electronically. The Post Office hates that. I don’t care. They’re doing ok without the revenue on this one by tricking everyone in America into using Priority Mail all the time when they really don’t have to.

©2003 saintsteven

don’t you love her as she’s walking out the door?